Thursday, May 15, 2008

Invisible Aliens

I was at Walgreen’s today, and I noticed that someone had left a yellow sticky note on a pile of plastic-packaged women’s robes. The sticky note said:

Hello Invisible Alien Population:
Mozart’s Current Body “Hit” In Chicago.
S.O.S.

I wondered who had left the note. Of course, it could have been a crazy person. But maybe it was someone who knows invisible aliens. Or maybe it was an actual invisible alien! Who knows?

Either way, it struck me as really funny. I really wished I had a camera with me. Then I thought, “It’s a sticky note. I could just take it.” But then I thought, “Would it be okay to take the sticky note? Was it even right to take it? And what might happen to me if I took it?” I called Iwanski and asked him what he thought. “I don’t know,” he said, “You might incur the wrath of the invisible aliens if you take it.” I wasn’t sure if I was ready to endure their wrath, so I left it there.

But then I started thinking. What did the note mean? Mozart’s Current Body “Hit”? Could this just be a secret gang communication? But then what did “S.O.S.” mean? Save our Ship…an alien spaceship? That would mean the writer had to be an invisible alien himself!

So I settled on the only logical explanation: There are invisible aliens living in Chicago, and they murdered the reincarnation of Mozart. Yep, that’s right. That’s gotta be what it means.

So for the next few days, I will be working to find traces of invisible aliens. They are invisible, so I’m sure it won’t be easy. Perhaps yellow sticky notes will be my only clues.

It will be very time-consuming, so I will not have any time to do any writing.

I will update you on my progress in a few days.

Wish me luck!

9 comments:

sfoofie said...

Pip, pop, luck, and all that. I'm jealous you found a craz-tastic sticky note. Good thing you have an Iwanski to bounce off invisible alien sticky note stealing ideas.

Will you be up in swiss-wis this weekend? Stopping through brew city at all? If so, you better stinkin call me. No blaming it on invisible aliens.

sfoofie said...

PS: If you do a google search for "Hello Invisible Alien Population" your blog is #1! You better hope their next "hit" in Chicago is not MHP!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ya know, I frequently trip over invisible things.... now I know what I am tripping over! Invisible alien carcasses!! (or Mozart's carcass.)

Thank you for making me realize that I'm not just plain clumsy.

Leah said...

Sounds like an investigation into this sticky note is the perfect job for our boys at the Department of Homeland Security.

ROMA said...

That's funny or maybe scary. What if you were being watched by an invisible alien while you pondered stealing the note? If you start looking into this be sure to have your cell phone charged and Iwanski on speed dial. Good Luck.

Lorraine said...

Ok, dude, all I could think about is my alien abduction in Sims2 and the subsequent twin alien babies born to a human. Also, the fact that said alien twins are now grown and have married humans and had babies and the babies are sorta alien.

Also, the other thing I thought is how cool is your husband that when you called to ask him about the note he totally had a recommendation rather than saying, "Are you f*&^ing kidding me? I'm working here!"

Br. Jonathan said...

This is weird. Just a couple of days ago, I began playing a Mozart piano sonata that I hadn't played in 25 years. It's the invisible aliens!

Unknown said...

Wacky Walgreens! When I lived at Devon and Western the Walgreens undercover guy accused me of shop lifting. He didn't get that I worked at the Radio Shack in the same strip mall.

BTW - I tagged you with a meme. Maybe you'll find it fun.

Miss Healthypants said...

LOL! You all make me laugh! :)

A quick note to Sfoofie--we did end up going to Cheddarland this weekend, but it was a REALLY quick visit (only one day with the folks, and later in the day Sheki & her family and your Mom joined us). So, sorry we didn't stop in Brew City to see you.

But we'll see you in a couple of weeks, right? Whoo hoo! Go Cubbies! :)