I was at Walgreen’s today, and I noticed that someone had left a yellow sticky note on a pile of plastic-packaged women’s robes. The sticky note said:
Hello Invisible Alien Population:
Mozart’s Current Body “Hit” In Chicago.
I wondered who had left the note. Of course, it could have been a crazy person. But maybe it was someone who knows invisible aliens. Or maybe it was an actual invisible alien! Who knows?
Either way, it struck me as really funny. I really wished I had a camera with me. Then I thought, “It’s a sticky note. I could just take it.” But then I thought, “Would it be okay to take the sticky note? Was it even right to take it? And what might happen to me if I took it?” I called Iwanski and asked him what he thought. “I don’t know,” he said, “You might incur the wrath of the invisible aliens if you take it.” I wasn’t sure if I was ready to endure their wrath, so I left it there.
But then I started thinking. What did the note mean? Mozart’s Current Body “Hit”? Could this just be a secret gang communication? But then what did “S.O.S.” mean? Save our Ship…an alien spaceship? That would mean the writer had to be an invisible alien himself!
So I settled on the only logical explanation: There are invisible aliens living in Chicago, and they murdered the reincarnation of Mozart. Yep, that’s right. That’s gotta be what it means.
So for the next few days, I will be working to find traces of invisible aliens. They are invisible, so I’m sure it won’t be easy. Perhaps yellow sticky notes will be my only clues.
It will be very time-consuming, so I will not have any time to do any writing.
I will update you on my progress in a few days.
Wish me luck!