Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Iwanski Rule #17

Ah yes, yet another Iwanski rule has revealed itself.

Are you ready for Iwanski rule #17?

Are you sure??

OK, here it is:


You must not, under any circumstances, EVER use a gift bag to give a gift to someone. You must always use regular wrapping paper to wrap presents. Apparently if you attempt to use a gift bag, your head will explode or something.

I know it’s weird, but Iwanski is quite concerned that using a gift bag might signify that you didn’t put much thought into the present.

Miss Healthypants has attempted to thwart this rule in the past, saying things like, “But it’s a big basket full of bubble baths and lotions—can’t I just use a gift bag?” “No!” Iwanski responds, as if I just asked him if I could stab the cats. No, wait, he would probably like it if I stabbed the cats (since they’re always throwing up on the carpet and committing random acts of mischief). But you get the idea.

NO GIFT BAGS! Or else…you will incur the wrath of Iwanski.

Unless you’re Miss Healthypants, who ignores the Iwanski rules half the time, anyway. (Only she knows that the “wrath of Iwanski” merely consists of a smirk and a head shake.)


Citymouse said...

actually, I like to receive gift bags, because you can reuse them~

Mathman6293 said...

I think: the gift back reflects lazy wrapping and doesn't reflect anything about the gift the gift.

I might agree with Iwanski but for different reasons.

Anonymous said...

I'm going to give him all his presents in gift bags from now on.....hehehehehe

Diane said...

Iwanski isn't the only one who thinks like that. My family is like that too. I really dislike it when people send Christmas cards that only contain the sender's signature. That really shows a lack of effort.

Lynn said...

We are big into saving trees and the environment, so we not only use gift bags we reuse and recycle them for all major holidays and birthdays. It has been over a year since we have had to buy any new ones. It is now a family tradition to see which of the bags will be yours this year. See Iwanski gift bags aren’t all bad.

Gilman Chatsworth said...

If you ever saw me wrap a gift, you'd beg for a giftbag.

Gilman Chatsworth said...


It actually annoys me to get a Christmas card with more than a signature. I don't even want my name written at the top with a comma.

Buck said...

Are you ready for this?
My mom hates to wrap gifts, so one Christmas, as a gift, I gave her about a hundred gift bags in various sizes.

To this day, she says that was the best present I've ever given her and she thinks of me every time she uses one.

BTW - you've just convinced me not to get a cat.

Sling said...

I wouldn't risk incurring the wrath of Iwanski if I were you.
You never know when smirking and head shaking might escalate into full-blown finger wagging!

sageweb said...

Oh I am a gift bag lover!! I re-use them...but making sure I don't give them to the person who gave it to me. Except in one case a friend of mine ..we exchanged the same bad for several years as a finally wore out.

rosemary said...

I'm with the bag them, convenient, re-usable.....see, saving the environment.....can be filled to the top, cats love them if they are big enough and the handles are taken off, could be used to line a small trash can for frivolity, etc, etc.

MaryRuth said...

I don't like the bags either. Way back when, when dept stores gave out "real" boxes, my mom would wrap just the top half of the box and we re-used those for many years. I still have one from the 70's.
I love the number system, BTW. My ex had numbered rants. Saved time that way.

Daisy's Mom said...

I can tell you where the gift bag aversion probably comes from. When we were kids, certain family members would purchase gifts at the last minute and hand them to you in the plastic store bag. It seemed like little thought or effort went into the gift... and the gift was given as an obligation.

I totally get his aversion... but I do use and recycle gift bags. It took a while for me to see the value of gift bags...

Miss Healthypants said...

Thanks for all the interesting comments, y'all! :)

Sling--I just wanted to tell you that I try to avoid the finger wagging as much as I can! LOL! :)

Lorraine said...

Oh, dear. See, I'm clinically unable to wrap a decent present. Gift bags are my only way out.

I'd also like to submit that once there are little Iwanskis and they start going to myriad birthday parties, he'll rethink the whole gift bag thing.