Tuesday, June 16, 2009

This Blog Has Teeth

Guess what happens when you get a root canal with a temporary filling, and you don't go back to the dentist for three more years?

You have to have another root canal!

That's right, folks, Miss Healthypants did a really stupid thing and put off a visit to the tooth doctor for three years--and now, she will suffer the consequences.

And the worst part is, I don't even really mind going to the dentist that much--at least, not once I'm there. With modern pain-killing substances, I hardly ever feel pain while seated in the dentist's chair.

No, the part I hate about going there is actually just taking the time off to go there.

I mean, if I'm going to take some sick time or vacation time from work, I want to enjoy my time off--I want to wallow in my sickness while Iwanski brings me chicken soup, or wallow in my own filth while I sit in my pajamas all day and not take a shower.

Sitting in a dentist's chair just isn't quite as fun.

But here's the real kicker--if I had just forced myself to go to the tooth doctor one time three years ago, I would have avoided another three hours that I will now have to waste with my mouth hung open while Mr. Dentist Dude scrapes around at my teeth.

I could just kick myself! A whole three hours—oh, what I could do with three whole hours of free time... I could take a long walk in the park...I could watch an Academy-Award winning movie...I could spend three hours at the zoo staring at the kookaburra, waiting for it to laugh...

Oh, who am I kidding—I would probably just sit around in my own filth, watching old Mr. Belvedere re-runs.

9 comments:

MaryRuth said...

I've been putting my root canal off for about 3 years now. My tooth amazingly stopped bothering me the moment I realized it was going to cost me $1500. And I'm not a dentist-phobe either, just hate spending the $$. I think I'll be going next month though. Hope someone makes ME chicken soup. Hope your goes well.

Diane said...

You make me laugh! Didn't that whole tooth thing start with that female military dentist? Dang,,, that is a long time ago!

Oh, btw, I think the jogging pants I wear to bed are filthy. I think I will wash them this week!

Br. Jonathan said...

Poor Poodle!

While you're in the dentist chair you can think about the Dvorak keyboard. It's what I would do . . .

rosemary said...

Would ear buds get in the way...or do you sing to your iPod? How did the tooth manage to stay intact for 3 years?

sageweb said...

I love going to the dentist..I am wierd though..but I go every 6 months. I love it. I think you should learn to love it too...did you know if you go every 6 months..it only takes about 30 minutes of you time..twice a year..see much better to go more often.

Random Thinker said...

Root canal - yuck. I understand how it could slip your mind for three years.

Jeanna said...

At least root canal hurts in the pocket book more than anything. It's a study in tedium though, isn't it.

Sling said...

I haven't been to the dentist in so long,I'd probably have to rent space in the office for a month.
3 hours doesn't seem too bad.

Maria said...

I have the worst teeth on the planet. Both of my parents had dentures by the time that they were 30 and I probably should have just bitten the bullet and gotten them too because I have SEVEN caps. And now I fear that I have passed this gene on to my daughter. She seldom has a good dental check up.

Her father has never had a cavity in his life and his mother grew up using a twig for a toothbrush and her teeth are stunningly white and healthy.

Ugh. Why couldn't my Liv have gotten HIS teeth?