What’s the weirdest thing that you’ve ever kept for years and years?
I bet I can beat them all.
And no, I’m not talking about the ten years of basketball, baseball, and football preview magazines that Iwanski for some reason insists on holding onto.
I’m talking about a HOT DOG that was sitting in a desk drawer for SEVEN YEARS.
That’s right, I said a HOT DOG, IN A DRAWER, for SEVEN YEARS.
Iwanski’s Mom thought that it would be just wonderful if she could keep one of the last hot dogs sold at the old Comiskey Park (which was torn down in 1990).
So she kept it. In a wrapper. In a desk drawer.
Years later, when Iwanski and I were given that desk, his brother-in-law Tony (who had helped move the desk) told him, "Your Mom said she kept the last hot dog sold at Comiskey in the bottom drawer of the desk. She thought you might want it."
And did Iwanski want it?
Well, not really. But hell, since it was there, he had to take a look. He carefully unwrapped the package. According to him, it had basically "mummified." (That should tell you how many preservatives and chemicals are in a hot dog!)
And what happened next?
Iwanski sent the hot dog to its grave in the bottom of the trash.
Thank GOD it’s gone.