Miss Cheddarpants

It's official. I can't escape it. I was born a Cheesehead, and a part of me will always be a Cheesehead.

Now my sister and brother-in-law have reinforced that fact by sending me, for Christmas...

CHEESE!



Of course, I am tickled pink. As I have previously-mentioned, instead of a sweet tooth, I have a cheese tooth. And now my cheese tooth will be satisifed.

So far, Iwanski and I have sampled the string cheese and chocolate cheese fudge...both were met with glowing reviews.

Hooray for cheese!

Miss Healthypants Reveals

1. I think Beavis and Butthead are hilarious. Once I even ordered a collection of Beavis and Butthead DVD’s from an infomercial. The poor accented fellow on the other end of the phone line tried to sell me about fifteen other items before finally finishing the sale. That was the first time I’ve ordered something over the phone—and it will definitely be the last time.

2. I eat salad every single day, unless I’m sick or it’s a holiday (and even then sometimes).

3. I now call my husband “Iwanski” to his face. Seriously--he’ll say something that really makes me laugh, and I’ll put my arms around him and say, “I love you, Iwanski.”

4. I watch “Seinfeld” re-runs nearly every day and can make a Seinfeld reference for anything. Seriously. Try to challenge me. You can talk about whales, belly buttons, or socks—and I can think of Seinfeld scenes involving each of those. (Off the top of my head, I can think of two scenes involving socks.)

5. I have to take a warm bubble bath at least once a week. It’s a Miss Healthypants requirement.

6. I don’t like expensive jewelry or purses. I’d rather spend my money on things like a trip to the Ozarks or a humongous pile of cheese.

7. I watch both “Hee Haw” and “The Marty Stuart Show” every single week. And I really enjoy both of them. (Marty Stuart kicks ass. So do Buck Owens and Roy Clark.)

8. I love reading parenting books, even though I’m not a parent. I think it’s because they are always chock-full of happy, touching success stories.

9. I swear like a trucker when I’m not at work. I probably should work on this if some day I would like to be a parent.

10. I just got distracted by the t.v. and accidentally wrote that I love reading trucking magazines. Now I can’t stop laughing.

A Weekend in Cheeseland

This weekend, Iwanski and I took a trip to Wisconsin to visit my Mom & Dad…and we also packed lots of other visiting into the weekend. I AM TIRED.

Here are some highlights of our weekend in ‘Scansin:

--Stopping off for a quick walk on a nature preserve along the way and seeing a sign that said “Do Not Feed Bread.” (What would one feed bread? What does bread like to eat?)

--Enjoying wicked-good green curry and funny conversation with my sister Sheri and my hubster.

--Having a blonde moment wherein I realized why egg-drop soup is such a bright yellow color.

--Seeing the excited expression on my almost-three-years-old niece Nora’s face when we showed up with my sister Sheri at Nora’s day care, to pick her up.

--Following Nora down the hallway of her “school,” as she proudly showed us the way to her locker.

--Sheri telling me she had a present for me, and then handing me a package of string cheese. (Only in Wisconsin does one get handed a “present” of string cheese within the first two hours of your visit. But of course, I loved it—fresh Wisconsin string cheese bought from the local cheese factory is a thousand times better than the crappy way-too-soft string cheese you can buy at the grocery store.)

--Tasting some cheese curds that were also purchased at the local cheese factory, and happily realizing that they were still “squeaky.” (Fresh cheese curds squeak a bit in your mouth when you eat them—and believe me, it is yummy!)

--Somehow being convinced to try Nora’s child-sized sit ‘n spin (which my skinny sister Sheri has no problem riding on)—and then realizing way too late that there was no way I could get my fat ass on that thing. Then laughing hysterically and proclaiming it to be the “most embarrassing moment of my life.”

--Being captivated by Nora Lu’s cuteness as she played with her Dad and with us—I especially loved it when Iwanski played with her and made her laugh, as she ducked in and out of her little cardboard playhouse. (See pictures below.)

--Having dinner with my parents and eating yet more cheese with dinner. (Are you sensing a pattern here?)

--My parents sharing stories of how they first found out about square dancing, how long it took them to learn how to square dance, and how many interesting people and places they were introduced to because they had joined a square dance club. [My parents have square danced on two cruise ships, both in the Atlantic and the Pacific, and they’ve also square danced on the East Coast, the West Coast, in the Midwest (of course) and in Canada.]

--My Mom getting excited when her favorite “Lotto Girl” came on WGN-TV to announce that day’s Illinois lottery winning numbers…and finding out that both she and my Dad really liked the one lotto announcer because, according to my Mom “she always wears such interesting outfits, and she’s so smiley and upbeat.” (Have you ever heard of anyone being excited to see a lottery announcer before?—especially one from another state?!)

--Suddenly realizing that my Mom (who had not yet put away her Easter decorations) had bunny decorations, bunny knickknacks, and stuffed bunnies in every corner of the living room—and then going through the house and counting SEVENTY-FIVE (yes, seventy-five!) decorative bunnies in their house—not to mention three more of them on a decoration in the front yard. Iwanski and I laughing our asses off over the plethora of bunnies.

--Having a great conversation with my sister Mary about life, nature, and animals—and finding out for the first time that there is a sturgeon spawning season, just as there is for salmon. (Mary said it is supposed to start next week, when the water temperature finally gets warm enough—and she said there are some spots nearby where she lives, where you can actually touch the sturgeons as they lay their eggs on the rocks.)

--Visiting with my sister Cindy and her granddaughter (my great niece) Amaya. Amaya is almost two years old and full of energy and big smiles. I spent a couple of hours on Saturday following her around and playing with her—and man oh man, I had a lot of fun, but she wore me out! But she is sooo adorable and fun, so it was worth it. (Who else but an almost-two-year-old can find it hilarious when you say “vroom, vroom” while turning the wheels on an exercise bike with your hands?)

--Enjoying bratwurst from a “real Wisconsin brat fry” with my family. (In the spring and summer in Wisconsin, it’s very common to see brats being “fried” (they’re not really fried, they’re grilled—but the Wisconsinites call it fried) at a stand outside your local grocery store, with the proceeds going to a local charity. It smells wonderful and tastes just as good.) And of course, I ate some more string cheese with our brat meal.

--Seeing my sister Bonnie and my nephew Nick (who lives in the suburbs of St. Paul, Minnesota—but spent his spring break with my family in Wisconsin). Nick (who’s in first grade) showed us his “Spring Break Collage” and “Cereal Box Car” (a toy car made from a cereal box) that he and his cousin Michael (who’s in college) had made together, and then he proclaimed Michael to be his “favorite cousin.” I’m telling you, that really warmed me cockles, to see the fantastic friendship that had developed among the two cousins.

--Visiting the nieciest niece Stacy and her husband Nabil, and meeting their precious three-month-old daughter Nina for the first time. (Nina was a bit cranky, but still smiled and “talked” with us a bit.) Enjoying delicious chicken, bacon, & ranch pizza and cheese sticks (eek! More cheese!) with Stacy and Nabil, while Nina hung out in her little swing nearby.

--Driving home and realizing that I had lost our little cord that plugs our MP-3 player into the car stereo, which made Iwanski very cranky and “lecturey” about carelessness…but then a few hours later, Iwanski realizing that he had left both his MP-3 player and his sunglasses in the rental car that he had dropped off in the evening rental return place earlier in the night.

--Thanking the universe for “even-ing things out” as I offered to walk back to the car rental place with Iwanski, smiling all the way. [Luckily, he had also left the car door open—and amazingly, the MP-3 player and sunglasses were still there. Still, I was glad that for once, Iwanski was careless, too. (It’s not just me!)]

--Iwanski saying, “I just had my ass handed to me by karma.”

--Relaxing and recovering from a weekend of socializing, full of good memories that will last a lifetime.

And now, without further adieu, are some pictures of my adorable niecey Nora Lu, for your enjoyment...

Mucho Queso!

Today, my niece Stacy (AKA the nieciest niece) posted the following inquiry on Facebook:

“Curious. Does anyone besides my family eat a piece of cheese with their leftover waffle syrup?”

Oh. My. Goodness. I totally forgot about that!

Growing up in Wisconsin, I can tell you that all the rumors/jokes about Wisconsinites eating a lot of cheese really are true. Wisconsinites eat an abundant amount of cheese. And they eat it with almost everything.

I can tell you that in the house where I grew up, we always had a plate of sliced cheese, with every meal. It was just something that we took for granted, a normal part of every family mealtime.

And in case you’re wondering, a slice of cheese with maple syrup is really good. I just totally forgot about it until Stacy brought it up. Now I’m dying to try it again.

Then my sisters Sheri and Bonnie joined in the Facebook conversation and mentioned their love of cheese dipped in applesauce, and strawberry jam and cheese sandwiches.

Wow! It had been a long time, but I remember eating both of those combos growing up, and loving how they tasted—especially strawberry jam and cheese sandwiches. Those were a staple of my childhood. Yum yum yum! I also remembered how much I used to like eating peanut butter and cheese sandwiches. Delicioso!

I know, I know—to those of you who didn’t grow up in Wisconsin, it may seem pretty odd to pair cheese with syrup, applesauce, peanut butter, or jam—but believe me, it’s all good.

Don’t knock it ‘till you try it!

Growing Up ‘Scansin: Part 1—The Cheese

For those of you who don't know, I grew up in a very itty bitty town in Wisconsin. And when I say “itty bitty,” I mean like a thousand people. And when I say Wisconsin, I mean that beer-swilling, cheese chompin' state directly to the north of Illinois that Buck appropriately called “lopsided.”

And I grew up there. And it was funny.

Why was it funny, you ask? I will tell you why, says me.

First of all, as you know, Wisconsinites like their cheese. But you may not realize how much they really do like it. When I was growing up, there was a plate of sliced cheese served at every meal. And I mean EVERY MEAL. And to keep up with supply and demand, there was the weekly trip to the cheese factory.

I LOVED going to the cheese factory with my Dad every Saturday morning. Well, maybe I didn’t love going there as much as what we got there. Of course, there was the usual purchase of aged American cheese (my Dad’s favorite). And then my Dad often bought cheese curds. For those of you who don’t know, let me first tell you what cheese curds are not. They are NOT cottage cheese, nor anything like cottage cheese. They are essentially little pieces of cheddar cheese in a curd like shape (see pic below), with a distinctive taste. They are yummy! And the best time to get them is when they are fresh from the factory, and they actually make a little squeaky noise when you chew them. I’m not kidding. Fresh, squeaky cheese curds are the best!



But even better than fresh cheese curds is fresh string cheese. That crap they sell in the stores under the labels of “Mootown Snackers” or the like does NOT compare to the delectable taste of fresh-from-the-factory string cheese. On the way to the cheese factory each week, my sister and I used to beg my Dad to buy us some string cheese. Sometimes he’d buy it for us (I guess all the whining sometimes got to him), but most of the time he’d refuse, because he couldn’t stand the way we’d peel layer by layer of the string cheese off and play with it, eating it very slowly. My Dad does not like finger food, and he especially didn’t like us kids playing with our food. But whenever he did agree to buy us string cheese, I was so happy! Even nowadays, when we go visit my parents, I raid the fridge and usually find fresh string cheese there. They told me they buy it especially for me when I come visit…aww, isn’t that sweet?

Wisconsinites’ passionate love for cheese was definitely one of the funniest parts of growing up ‘Scansin.